Four!! Can You Believe It!!

Well the day has come (and I NEVER thought that it would!!) that I received my fourth treatment in a row.

The nausea was a bit worse than last week. I just went up to bed and prayed for the day to be over. It finally happened but it sure took a loooong time! I made it though! The week was pretty rough but I kept moving and tried to take it easy at the same time. I know it sounds crazy but if I just stay put my mind starts to play tricks on me and I really am worse off than if I try to distract myself. Does anyone understand that?!?! I'm not sure that I do either but that my friends is chemo logic!

I saw the doctor this visit. Wow! After continually reminding him what medication I am on now, we talked about my counts. White counts were 5.4, which is good...dare I say perfect! That is higher than what they usually are and in the normal range. I know, pretty remarkable, huh? The low side of normal is in the 3's and I am usually in the 2's. I don't know if I've ever been in the 5's. So we are sticking with 4 shots this week instead of the 5. He said the extra shots are not dangerous, just a waste. Considering the shots are about $1000 each...gasp! I 'd say he has a point...

I am on track for treatment #5 on the 18th. If my counts stay in "my" normal, abnormal range we will keep going on this path. The plan is to increase the methotrexate back to my original dose (the dose we initially started with before all of the liver problems).

I can honestly say....I am sick of this routine. It is going to take a lot to get me through a whole year (starting now, not when I started chemo in Dec. the year starts once I continually get treatements week after week) of this. It certainly takes a certain mindset to be able to tackle this but I have become distracted by outside forces. I know I have it in me but I am going to have to dig deep to put the blinders back on and ignore the outside negative forces and focus on the real important issue...giving my family their mother/wife back. We are imperfect soles who truly need each other...

I'll be in touch!